


On The Couch

by ssa_archivist



Category: Smallville
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, Established Relationship, Futurefic, M/M, hurt-comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-04-17
Updated: 2005-04-17
Packaged: 2017-11-01 09:21:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/354898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssa_archivist/pseuds/ssa_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I don't know how it happened but it can't go on like this any longer. I can't survive these conditions any longer."<br/>This story is a response to CFF Wave 11.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On The Couch

## On The Couch

by Stephanie M

[]()

* * *

On The Couch by Stephanie M bj_forever@hotmail.co.uk Challenge: Counseling/Marriage/Partnership Summary: "I don't know how it happened but it can't go on like this any longer. I can't survive these conditions any longer." Warnings: There is a brief mention of s/m and b/d but nothing graphic Rating: Adults  
Shout outs: My thanks to Sarah who typed up the story after I broke my wrist and arm falling down the stairs three weeks ago and I've got this stupid plaster on for another three weeks. Without her I could not have met the deadline, so this story is dedicated to her. Thanks to my beta reader cloudlbep, without her this story would probably make no grammatical sense and she helped me come up with an idea for the ending. 

"You want us to WHAT?" 

"Go to counseling. Lex, we can't go on like this," Clark said with a sigh, knowing his husband wouldn't be happy, but he was tired of all the arguments. He loved Lex with everything he was and that would never change. Lately, however, they seemed to be going down in flames; either they were sniping at each other, giving each other the silent treatment or existing in a state of awkwardness. 

Lex snarled, "I do not need counseling. I am not sitting on a couch talking to some overpriced idiot. Anyway, Luthors do not tell some stranger everything they think or feel." 

"Either you do or I leave, Lex." Clark said honestly, hating himself for the brief spark of fear in his lover's eyes. He knew he had to bring out the big guns if he wanted Lex to take an active role in saving their relationship. 

Stalling for time Lex queried, "What makes you think we need counseling?" 

"We do nothing but argue and I can't live with this. I love you but I'm not going to be trapped in a relationship with a man who doesn't care enough about our relationship to fix it." 

Lex frowned knowing he was trapped since he would do anything for Clark. Lex didn't want to let some weird person inside his head but there was no choice it seemed, because he was not going to lose Clark over something so ridiculous as talking to someone about their problems. He could make sure whomever they saw did not keep notes anywhere they may be discovered. He did wonder if they would have To let this counselor know about Clark's abilities as he knew they would always be a problem in their relationship. 

"Fine but we make the decision about our counselor together because it concerns both of us. I'm going to run a check on the person and if I find so much as an unpaid parking ticket we are not seeing them." 

"Here are some names and numbers I researched," Clark said smiling as he passed over a piece of paper. 

Lex took the paper silently knowing it wasn't really a set up, it was Clark's nature to do everything possible to stop himself from being a burden, which annoyingly meant he was reluctant to accept any help. It upset Lex no end that his lover would not let him help when Lex had more than enough money, power and control to solve any problems that might appear. 

As he looked through the names Lex tried to figure out when their problems had started. He supposed it was six months ago but he couldn't think of what was the catalyst for the destruction of their relationship. He knew Clark loved him, he could still remember the shy declaration of love made five years ago when Clark had graduated. They had been dating for a since Clark's high school graduation but didn't get married until his younger love had completed college. Clark had insisted that they had to wait since he wasn't ready to just jump into a marriage and he wanted his parents to get used to the idea of them being together. It had hurt him at first to think Clark was ashamed of them, over time he realised it was the best thing to do since he would have time to prepare for Jonathon Kent's inevitable attack on their relationship. 

_Flashback_

"Thank you for inviting me to your graduation, Clark." 

"It wouldn't be right without you. I've been thinking about my life and I've decided that I can't go on without telling the one person I love how I feel." 

Ignoring the pain in his heart Lex suggested, "Why don't you tell Lana about how much you love her? She is not dating anyone at the moment, according to what she has said during our meetings. I know for a fact that she thinks you are cute and she cares about you a lot." 

Clark shook his head, "I'm not in love with Lana. It's not Chloe before you suggest her name. It's not any girl. I'm in love with a man." 

"You are gay, " Lex stated in amazement. He had dreamed of Clark in his bed for years and now in the space of a few seconds he had not only discovered Clark's homosexuality, meaning the teen would not be shocked by his own sexuality, but had also lost him to some faceless man. He would find out whoever the bastard was and kill him, or perhaps simply ruin him. It was far more satisfying to let someone spend years in pain rather than simply minutes or hours if you were lucky. 

"Yeah. I supposed I should have told you earlier but I wasn't really sure until recently." 

"What makes you think that you are gay?" 

Clark smirked, "The big flashing neon sign is that I'm in love with a man. I've been dreaming about being with him sexually ever since I first went to Metropolis after mom lost her baby. Being away from everyone let me think for the first time in a while. When I came back to Smallville I didn't know if it was just a phase so I left it alone." 

"Being gay is nothing to be ashamed of and is completely natural. There is nothing wrong with you, Clark. I suppose since we are sharing secrets I should tell you that I am gay." 

"What about your marriages?" 

"They were business arrangements. I am 100% gay but despite how open minded most people like to imagine they are, few people would be happy with an openly gay senator. I want to be President, and to that end I have in the past entered into business partnerships with several women. They pretended to be my partner and were given money and prestige in return." 

"Wow, I never realized you had made such complex plans for the future. I always thought you loved them, especially Helen." 

Lex laughed bitterly, "I never did. Helen was a problem, in that she threatened to out me to the press. When she realized it was not going to happen, she tried to kill me. Never underestimate the lengths a woman will go to in order to get something they want, in this case she wanted my money. She apparently felt that a three million dollar contract for a marriage of just over a year wasn't enough money." 

"I always knew she wasn't good enough for you." 

"I should listen to you in future before I get a new wedding contract. So who is this mystery man you are in love with? It's not Pete is it? If so, you should be ready for disappointment because I don't think he has any remotely homosexual feelings whatsoever." 

"It's not Pete, that would be like having sex with my brother. It's you, Lex." 

**"WHAT?"**

Taking a pale hand in his Clark admitted, "I love you. I have for a while but I didn't know what to do. Since we are both leaving town soon I wanted to let you know how I feel because I promised someone that I would talk to you. I know there is a good chance you don't return my feelings and I accept it. If you want we can leave Smallville and never see each other again. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable with me." 

"What do you want, Clark?" 

"I want to go to sleep every night holding you in my arms, and wake up each morning feeling you breathing against me. I want to spend the nights with you, talking, laughing, sharing everything and making love." 

"You've sure thought about it a lot. Are you sure that this isn't hero worship being mistaken for love because I'll never let you go once I have you in my arms." 

"I'm sure. I love you, Lex." 

"I love you too, Kal-El." Lex said kissing Clark's cheek gently, not wanting to risk anything more right now in case it scared the inexperienced alien. 

Clark gaped before saying confused, "What did you just call me?" 

Lex couldn't stop himself from laughing at the look of panic on his love's face, "I called you by your name. Your father has been visiting my dreams for a long time. He seems to think we are well suited. I have to say that I agree with him." 

"I do too. We should be getting back, Chloe's having a graduation party that I promised we would attend." 

"I was not invited." Lex said frowning; he had thought Chloe liked him in spite of his Luthor name. 

"You are. Chloe said there was no point in sending you an invitation when I would just end up taking you. Oh and she wants to take the first picture of us dating." 

"Who did you tell about your feelings for me apart from the delightful Miss Sullivan?" 

"I may have mentioned it to Whitney when I was explaining why I couldn't see him anymore. He probably told Lana and of course I told my mom. I'm not sure if she would accept us dating as easily as she claims but she appears to think you are okay. We agreed to wait a little until we tell Dad. He probably won't take the news very well." 

"I think that may well be the understatement of the year, Clark." Lex said dryly, knowing how much the man hated him. It was amusing how well adjusted Clark was considering the prejudices Jonathon Kent had about those with money and/or power. 

_End Flashback_

Mitzi smiled at the gorgeous brunette before saying, "Good morning, my name is Mitzi am I will be your marriage counselor. I am not here to pass judgment on you but to give you advice on your situation and help you find a solution that is best for you. Now why don't you tell me why you are here? Would you like to begin, Clark?" 

"Lex and I have been married for the last three years but things really haven't been right between us for around six months now. I don't know how it happened but it can't go on like this any longer. I'm beginning to feel as if I'm not wanted anymore and I don't know what I've done to deserve this treatment." 

Lex laughed, "That's ridiculous. You know I love you. Shouldn't the fact that I've come here to listen to expensive platitudes tell you that?" 

Mitzi nodded, "Why do you think coming here is proof that you love Clark?" 

"I've given up my time and I've come here despite my distaste for people in your profession. It shows that I'm willing to sacrifice my own ideals for Clark." 

Writing a brief note the woman queried, "Why do you feel you are to blame for this problem in your relationship, Clark?" 

Clark sighed, "I do nothing but hurt the people I love. My mom has never been able to carry a child to term. I was adopted. When she did get pregnant after years she lost the baby because of me." 

"What do you mean?" 

Answering her question Clark stopped himself from crying as he admitted, "There was an explosion at the farm because I hit a gas pipe and mom was injured and lost the baby." 

Mitzi concluded, "From what you have told me I can say that this wasn't your fault. Nothing you did could have saved the baby. Your mother has a history of miscarriages; therefore it was unlikely she would be able to successfully carry a baby to term. Who else do you think has been hurt because they loved you?" 

Having given it a lot of thought over the years Clark smoothly reeled off the names, "My best friend, Chloe, was killed in front of me because I wasn't quick enough to stop the guy robbing the store from shooting her. My first boyfriend, Whitney, got in a car accident after leaving my house the day that I told him about my new relationship with Lex. He was paralyzed from the waist down because he was too busy crying to see where he was going. The second time mom was ill and I didn't get there in time so she died. Lex and I were busy working when I didn't hear the message she left on the machine. It was my mom calling me to take her to the hospital because she had pains in her chest. Dad was at the market out of state so he couldn't help." 

"These are all very tragic circumstances, however none of these are your fault, nor should you be feeling guilty because of them. Who told you that everyone's safety was your responsibility, Clark, and when?" 

"My dad has been saying all my life that I should help as many people as I can, and that because I don't think, people get hurt. He said that the day mom lost the baby. At mom's funeral he said that I ignored the message on our machine on purpose because she didn't approve of Lex after we were married. I asked him six months ago if he meant it and he said yes. He said that I shouldn't be settling down and forgetting my duty to my friends and family. He said that because I was with Lex, I was forgetting my responsibilities, and that being with Lex had made me change for the worse. He said that I should get away from Lex because I would only end up hurting him." 

Lex growled at his husband's confession, having known that Jonathon Kent had placed immense burdens on Clark, but never knowing the man would stoop so low as to accuse Clark of willfully killing his mother. The man knew for a fact that Clark has been exposed to red kryptonite, which had turned his hearing to normal human levels. 

After years of study Lex had determined that different pieces of red kryptonite affected Clark differently. The research into kryptonite was an interesting field. There were far more types than he had ever imagined. So far he had discovered nine; green, red, white, gold, blue, jewel, slow, X, and Anti, the last three were developed by scientists while the others he assumed were natural. He was in the process of developing a type of kryptonite that would allow Clark to fulfill his dream of having their own children. Clark wanted to carry a child of their own, so Lex was devoting his time and money to the project. 

"Your father placed too much responsibility on you. You cannot control people or stop them from making bad decisions. Tragedies happen and people get hurt or die. It is not your duty or responsibility to save everyone. Your fears that Lex may be hurt sometime are understandable, and given your father's reaction I can understand how this may be influencing your relationship. What you must remember Clark, is that Lex could still be hurt even if he was not with you. You must remember that Lex made the decision to be with you, knowing that he could get hurt but felt it was worth it because he loves you." 

Lex took hold of his husband's hand wanting to reassure the man of his love and commitment. Okay, so he had been a little unreasonable lately but he had feared Clark was having an affair given the man's refusal to talk to him and the little amount of time Clark had been spending with him. He couldn't remember the last time they had slept together, which said a lot since people often remarked that they couldn't touch each other without having sex. 

Clark looked down at their joined hands, "I know that, but sometimes I think Dad's right, I cause too much pain and I should keep away from anyone I love." 

"Is anything else bothering you, Clark?" 

Wondering how the woman managed to read him so well he nodded, "I know Lex wants to be a President and I'm worried that being with me will ruin his chances. The laws may have made it illegal to bring up someone's sexuality when they are going for office but it doesn't matter, as people know about us. People are still close-minded in private if not in public. I don't want to be the reason for his dream being destroyed." 

Lex said passionately, "It won't be Clark. If I am not President, I have my dream because I have you. I've been in lust with you from the day we met and in love with you since about a week after that. I would have asked you to marry me as soon as I realized that I love you if I hadn't thought that you would hate me. I can still be President and be gay, Clark. People have changed in the last five years so they may not be as homophobic as you think. We've got an openly gay military so why not a President?" 

"Lex, can you tell me what you have been feeling lately and how you have been feeling about your relationship?" 

Lex smiled deciding she wasn't completely bad, despite her name and come hither glances at Clark. She had already helped solve some of their problems. He was worried, though, about how he could tell Clark what he had been thinking without the man completely losing it. 

Lex softly explained, "I will admit that I have been feeling confused and admittedly I have been distant. I was worried because Clark had kept some big secrets from me in the past. At first I thought that he was ill and didn't want to tell me. Clark almost died from a rare form of cancer while in high school and he didn't tell me until he had been ill for a while. Then I thought he having an affair because I know I'm not exactly the greatest husband. I'm moody, manipulative, cold and I find it difficult to show my emotions. I know there are people who would treat my Clark better than I treat him." 

Ripping his hand from Lex's grip Clark started pacing, "I can't believe you would think so little of me! I didn't talk to my parents for over a year because they didn't approve of you. I punched my best friend in the face because he said that I should have left you to die when that guy attacked you because he was fired from the factory the day after graduation." 

"Sit down Clark and we will discuss this calmly." Mitzi said before continuing, "How do you feel about what Lex has said now that you are feeling a little calmer?" 

Needing to calm down Clark counted to ten before saying, "I can understand why he felt like that, because I can be quite secretive and I kept a lot of very important secrets for years. It was things that I thought he should know but my parents had said I could not tell him. I wouldn't tell Lex right away if I had a life threatening illness because I wouldn't want to terrify him until I knew something about it. I know he has had a lot of problems with people he loves leaving him or people telling him that they love him because they want something in return." 

"Okay. Can I please tell you what I think your problems are and how they can be solved?" 

"Of course, Mitzi" Clark said eagerly smiling when Lex nodded. 

Mitzi looked down at her notepad before declaring, "Lex has experienced problems with commitments in the past, meaning he is a bit wary. He also is not sure of how to behave and has serious trust issues. Lex is waiting for the other shoe to drop but doesn't realize that this will only happen if he does not share his fears and concerns about the future and your relationship. Clark on the other hand has a serious guilt complex and he is scared of ruining your relationship. Clark, you need to understand that Lex knows that you could hurt him just like he can hurt you. As much as anyone can keep a promise Clark is not going to leave you, Lex. My advice for you both is to remind yourself of why you're together and why you love it. Take some time alone, perhaps a vacation somewhere special to both of you. You can go now, I don't think I will be seeing you again." 

"Okay, thank you." Clark said happily, a wide grin forming on his face when Lex grabbed hold of his hand and kissed it softly. 

Five days later Clark looked up from the book he was reading wanting to know what had made Lex so excited. No one would believe him if he ever said that Lex Luthor was actually skipping towards him. He knew this couldn't be the usual good news about another takeover or a new Warrior Angel acquisition. 

Ever since they had finished the counselling session with Mitzi life had been amazing. They had discussed their problems at length before taking the decision to have one word they would use to indicate they had a problem that needed talking about. Safe words were something they had become comfortable with using over the course of their relationship and neither would abuse their world or use it in a joke. This time they had to be more aware of each one because their marriage would not survive another six-month disaster. 

Lex smiled widely as he walked into over to the bed, "My beautiful Kal, I have some wonderful news. You will never believe it!" 

"What is it?" 

"I've just had a call from Sam Seaborn and Josh Lyman. They wanted to set up a meeting for us with the President. It seems that he wants to discuss my becoming his Vice President." 

"Amazing. What did you tell them?" 

"I said they would have to wait since I was on my second honeymoon with my beautiful husband. Are you sure spending our second honeymoon here in Peru is okay?" 

Knowing the pair could ruin Lex's career Clark frowned, "Of course. I love it here and the people will leave us alone. How did they react to hearing about us?" 

"They wished us well and asked how long we had been married. They appeared to be more interested in learning if you were the Clark Kent who spoke twenty languages and had degrees from Brown and Met. U." 

"Did you ask why?" 

"Yes. Apparently they would like to have you join the White House, I told them we would talk about it and let them know in a fortnight." 

Clark nodded at this before getting off the chair and kneeling at Lex's feet exposing his neck. His voice calm he whispered, "I'm sorry for hurting you. I will do better in the future. I love you, Master." 

Lex smirked before saying, "I know. Take off your clothes and present yourself. I am going to punish you for keeping your worries secret." 

"Yes, Master. Do you want me to get the whip?" Clark said knowing his lover would know what he needed. 

"Get the red one, I took the liberty of soaking it in Orgasmanite this morning." Lex said smiling as he thought about the form of kryptonite he had made two years ago that lowered Clark's pain barrier. 

Both of them enjoyed pain sexually and had taken the decision to include it in their relationship. It was startling when they had realised their tastes sexually were almost exactly identical with the main difference being that Clark liked playing submissive a little more than Lex. On occasions where Lex was submissive and on the receiving end of a whipping, their sexual encounter lasted slightly less than other times at around five hours. As a result of their relationship Lex has been altered by Jor-El to heighten his stamina and cock size to suit Clark's body. 

Clark knelt down at Lex's feet in silence, a black collar on his neck with Lex's name in Krypton engraved on the side. He was relieved that Lex knew instinctively that he needed this, to submit and show he was sorry for what he had done. The scene would no doubt be repeated at a later date by Lex, as this was their preferred way of apologising for breaking one of their rules or hurting the other. 

"We'll work out the rest of our issues the old fashioned way, with sex." Lex said as he pulled his love, his slave for the night into the bedroom closing the door behind him with a slam. 

The End 


End file.
